Today's picture is brought to us by the Consumer Product Safety Commission as a pre-July 4th warning on the hazards of fireworks. These two darling mannequins are strategically placed so that one sets the other on fire with a measly little sparkler. Presumably, their dresses are made of fatwood or the rags used to clean up the Exxon Valdez oil spill.
1. There could be no clearer representation of the danger posed when one motionless girl is positioned to hold fire against another motionless girl.
2. "Gimme the magnifying glass! I want to do the other one!"
3. K-Mart eventually caved in to the powerful Mormon lobby and destroyed the "plastic harlot temptresses".
4. Sparklers don't kill people. Animated, blood-thirsty mannequins with sparklers kill people.
5. If you find yourself stranded on a desert island with two white girls, you can rub them together to make fire.
1. It’s never pretty when Old Navy mannequins get into a turf war.
2. “This’ll teach you to show up at the mannequin party wearing the same dress as me, bitch!”
3. “A lot of you may be thinking that this looks dangerous, but really who among us wouldn’t be better off without their right breast and belly button?”
4. “That one took a whole 12 seconds before the face started to melt. Tell Wal-Mart we’ve got another kids dress ready for them.”
5. “To wrap things up, children, what do we do when we suspect that our sister is a witch?”
We are both confident that you can do better than this. Nothing screams "funny" like burning kids. Please put your own captions in the Comments section below. You could win our grand pri...our grand...hey where'd we put that thing? Has anyone seen that cartoon picture of the Wonder Twins? Dammit, we had it here just a second ago.
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