1. When you translate the "Hokey Pokey" into Turkish, you get really disturbing results.
2. "There has got to be a better way to get out these smudges. Don't you guys have a Swiffer or something?"
3. The Supreme Court had no idea what Ashton Kutcher meant by "You've just been punked," but they did know that he was about to be fast-tracked to a really rapey prison.
4. Yes their services were expensive but they had never failed to find a contact lens.
5. Willy Wonka said the floor would taste like butterscotch. Willy Wonka lied.
1. "Hey, my board smells like feet and ass too. How about yours, Faruk?"
2. Turkish scientists caused a commotion during the unveiling of their new pheromone compound when they accidentally spilled it on the floor.
3. The most humble man in the group is chosen to be the Goddess's tampon for the entire year.
4. "Remember the rules, gentlemen - the first one to slide his quarter to the other side of the gym using only his nose wins a brand new camel!"
5. People probably wouldn't respect the Supreme Court as much if they knew what their initiation process involved.
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