Philip's list:
1. After years of gorging themselves on cheese and beer, GM workers were no longer able to work on interiors of any cars other than oversized SUVs.
2. CEO put all of their money on Patriots to win 2008 Superbowl. Dammit, that was supposed to be a sure thing!!
3. In retrospect, those ads featuring a topless Ed Asner probably didn't help.
4. After watching that Michael Moore documentary, GM executives have been afraid to leave their homes since 1989.
5. Seriously, whose idea was it to use a single Mississippi trailer park for all of GM's focus groups?
Douglas's list:
1. Having Rick Springfield perform in the lunchroom every day surprisingly adds up.
2. In hindsite, they really shouldn't have used Perrier in the bidets.
3. Selling cars the size of most third world houses proved to be less than economical.
4. Marketing Department really should have crunched the numbers before their, "Buy a truck, get a Cheetah Girl Free" promotion.
5. When hiring a spokesman, you should really know which Baldwin brother you're getting.
8 comments:
Kinda scary that such a big company can go under like that. And judging by the photo, the guy obviously had too many botox injections around the mouth.
1) In hindsight, GM's CEO probably shouldn't have taken the bailout money to Vegas and 'let it ride.'
2) The April's Fool prank that backfired when workers took the new banner, "We will create cars that suck!" too seriously.
3) Goddamn Japs. First Pearl Harbor and now THIS?!?
4) Usage of Jeff Foxworthy as the voice of the navigation system proves likable to only .0001% of the population.
5) Extending the Affirmative Action process to homeless crack whores proves costly as most employees begin squatting in new Tahoes.
Theresa - Btox is an expensive mistress. And clearly this guy needs all the hlp he can get.
Moog - The thing I hate most about Japanese cars is that you're just stuck with the damn things FOREVER! I've had a Camry for 12 years and it flat refuses die.
GM had great ideas..Let's not make jest at them. Make cars that break down in less than two years. Pay everyone, execs,factory workers excessive salaries for making cheap, half-assed products,wait except for the foriegn laborers actually making the components for pennies an hour.. then ask the government for 60 billion dollars to bail them out..That's more than we spend on education in this country in a whole year! These are smart guys.
Hurray for GM..
I hear you, Megaman. I have no idea how that business plan failed.
GM really went under when hundreds of thousands of men demanded their money back because their hummers weren't exactly what they were expecting.
Top 5 Reasons for GM Failure:
Reason #1 Chevy Chevette
#2 Caddys were little more than pimped out Caprices
#3 Too many cars that looked the same. Was that a Buick, Pontiac, Chevy or Olds? Who knows, who cares?
#4 Did I mention the Chevette?
#5 To get a European presence, they needed to buy a European car company. Which one, which one? Mercedes? Too classy. Ferrari? Too sexy. Volkswagon? Too innovative. What company makes the most boring, poor selling cars? Saab? Perfect for GM.
Someone finally discovered they all rolled in their own piss before meetings and had to bribe people into not telling for WAY too many years
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