Philip's List:
1. Camp Pet-O-File: For all you animal lovers out there who want to spend the summer having fun with your pets. Why - what did you think it meant?
2. Kentucky Mash Camp: A must for science lovers, this camp teaches kids the joys of making nice, smooth bourbon for their counselors to enjoy.
3. Crocodile Camp: Hey, kids! Old Man Perkins has been having trouble feeding the crocs since the loss of his second arm, so come on down and learn all about reptile farming!
4. Carnie Camp: Come on, kid, just get in the truck and you can travel all over the country with the carnival, living like a rock star! Hurry up, kid, your mom’s coming back!
5. Camp ConAgra: Your child will enjoy all of the sights and smells of working on the line in a real chicken processing plant!
Douglas's list:
1. The Phil Spector Camp of Hair Design and Target Shooting. Stop wearing caps and start popping caps as you learn the secrets of hair magnificence and the masculine power of handguns.
2. The Jennifer Lopez "How to Get Rich With Your Ass" Camp. Optional weekend courses to include lip-synching and shadow-humping backup dancers.
3. The Brett Favre Quarterback Clinic and Retirement Seminar. You will learn Brett's patented methods for throwing footballs at receivers in any color uniform, while at the same time guiding you through the maze of Medicare options.
4. The Oprah Winfrey Advanced Genital Naming Camp. From Vajayjay to Penisaurus Rex and everything in between - each participant will receive a certificate proudly featuring the likeness and new moniker of their reproductive organs.
5. The Victoria Beckham Intestinal Purging Camp. Posh Spice will explain, and illustrate with lifelike props, her secret methods for gagging and not gagging at will.
Got some fun summer camp names of your own? You know what to do.
8 comments:
1) The Carrot Top Camp for Bad Comedy and Facial Deformity. Props will be included and each child gets 1 steroid injection AND free Botox shots!
2) Dick Cheney's Rifle Camp. Bring a friend!
3) Camouflage Camp. (the opening of this camp has been postponed until we locate the kids from last year)
4) Lindsay Lohan DWI Camp. Booze, bushes and speeding cars! How exciting! Lesbianism is not provided, however it is encouraged.
5) Orgy Camp. (sorry...all open slots for this camp have been filled)
And how about the Redneck Camp? Camp yell? "Git her done!"
Moog - Orgy Camp? Slots have been filled? You may not have realized that could have sexual connotations. Hope I didn't embarass you!
Quirky - Sleeves optional.
LMAO! You had me at Camp pet-o-file
sign me up for Oprahs camp! Oh wait just for kids you say? I have the mentality of a 9 year old does THAT count?
Kirsten: You probably shouldn't say that out loud.
Dizz: Yes, it does, but you would be in danger of turning it into Kirsten's favorite camp.
I never sent my kids to camp, I just had them blend in with the kids that the lady down the street babysat.
So that's where they learned how to roll their own!
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